Chasing Dopamine: Why the Here and Now Never Feels Like Enough (With Real-Life Examples)

Ever feel like you’re sprinting through life, always reaching for something just out of reach? A better job, a new car, a fitter body, or even a new hobby to “fix” your boredom? You’re not alone. This constant itch for more is rooted in how our brains work, thanks to dopamine—the neurotransmitter that pushes us toward future rewards.

But what does that actually look like in everyday life?  Let’s break it down.

1. The “New Job” Cycle

You land your dream job and feel on top of the world—at first. A few months in, that initial excitement fades. Now you’re looking at other opportunities, wondering if a different company will pay more, offer better perks, or give you more recognition. Sound familiar? That’s dopamine talking. It fuels the thrill of getting the job but doesn’t stick around for the day-to-day grind.

• Shift Perspective: Instead of focusing on the next promotion, ask yourself: What do I enjoy about my current role? Maybe it’s the flexibility, the team, or the fact that it allows you to grow in ways you didn’t expect. Gratitude for the present can make the work feel more meaningful.

2. The “Perfect Body” Loop

You set a fitness goal—lose 20 pounds, hit a new PR at the gym, or fit into an old pair of jeans. When you finally get there, you feel good…for a while. Then you start critiquing yourself again. Maybe you want a flatter stomach or a more sculpted look, and the cycle starts all over.

• Shift Perspective: Celebrate progress, not perfection. Instead of chasing an ever-moving goal, take a moment to honor what your body can do today. Maybe it’s running a little further, lifting a little heavier, or simply feeling healthier than you did last year.

3. The “Next Big Purchase” Trap

You save up for that new car, gadget, or home upgrade, imagining how much better life will be once you have it. Then you get it, and while it’s exciting for a bit, the thrill wears off faster than expected. Now you’re eyeing the next shiny thing—a bigger house, a flashier car, or the latest tech.

• Shift Perspective: Instead of viewing purchases as the source of happiness, focus on what those things enable. That car might mean road trips with loved ones. That house might mean hosting dinners for friends. Find joy in the experiences, not just the objects.


4. The “Social Media Scroll” Addiction

You scroll Instagram or TikTok looking for something to entertain, inspire, or motivate you. Each new video gives a little dopamine hit, but before you know it, an hour has passed, and you feel drained instead of fulfilled.

• Shift Perspective: Limit mindless scrolling and replace it with something intentional, like connecting with friends or creating something yourself. True satisfaction comes from doing, not just consuming.

5. The “Perfect Relationship” Fantasy

You’re dating someone amazing, but after a while, the honeymoon phase ends, and your brain starts asking, Is this really it? You wonder if there’s someone more compatible, more exciting, or more perfect.

• Shift Perspective: No relationship is perfect, and the grass isn’t greener, it’s greener where you water it. Instead of chasing perfection, focus on growing intimacy, trust, and fun in your current relationship. That’s where lasting joy lives.​

The Bottom Line

Dopamine is great at keeping us hungry for more, but it’s not the key to happiness. Everyday fulfillment comes from slowing down, noticing what’s already good, and finding joy in the little things. So next time you catch yourself chasing that “next big thing,” pause. Look around. Appreciate where you are, who you’re with, and what you have. After all, life isn’t about what’s next—it’s about what’s now.